Physical health is getting all the new year attention. It’s the easy part of working on yourself… there’s a laid out plan and a calendar to follow. Mental health is where the real work is… there is no guide. For me, the two are very closely connected and they are both something I work on daily.
Today I want to tell you about a takeaway from another favorite chapter of mine from “13 Things Mentally Strong Women Don’t Do” by Amy Morin. (I also shared more from this book when I wrote about perfectionism).
Chapter 4 is all about self doubt. I love how the author includes a checklist of questions in every chapter….I checked most of the boxes for this one. I have no idea why self doubt is such a thing for me. But I’m guessing since there’s a whole chapter on it, there are many people out there that experience my same feelings.
I’m someone that prefers to play it safe- I need to be sure of things. I’m a rule follower and I hate doing things outside of my comfort zone. If there’s a possibility that I could fail, no thanks. I’m a true enneagram 1. I laughed this week when my mom said, “Yea, I think you were my most serious baby.” LOL- I’m not surprised!
When you are a self- doubter, it creeps into your life in very small and big ways…
-Should I raise my hand and share my answer? No, what if I’m not 100% right? (A feeling I vividly remember having from elementary school all the way through grad school).
-Should I do this grad school thing? No, what if I can’t keep up with the workload? What if I fail? (I only ended up doing this because of how much I was encouraged by others).
-Should I start a blog? No, even though you’ve wanted to do this for years, no one will care what you have to say- there’s already too many blogs out there. (I made this happen because of the continued gentle nudging from my older sister).
These negative conversations we have in our head can really hold us back.
One of my favorite parts of this chapter is when Morin suggests reviewing the worst case scenario for something you are doubting. What is the actual worst thing that could happen?
I recently asked myself this when deciding to become an online health & fitness coach. I said no to the opportunity for months. But when I finally walked myself through the worst case scenario, it wasn’t that bad…
What’s the worst case scenario if I decide to coach?
-People will be annoyed by me. (If people are bothered by me, they don’t have to follow me. I’m doing this to find the people it will help).
-No one will join with me (I’ll still be working on my own health & getting a great discount).
-People won’t understand why I’m doing something different. (My life choices aren’t about other people … it’s ok to evolve and be in a new season).
-I’ll have to post on social media to share what I’m doing. (Totally doing that already, it just might look a little different).
Then I decided to consider the best case scenario…
I help at least 1 person change their life through health changes & a fitness routine.
So I decided to say yes to something that fulfills me because those worst case scenarios were lame reasons to say no. The best case scenario is what I’m in it for.
I hope you’ll reflect today on how self doubt could be playing a role in keeping you from reaching a goal. Jot down those worst case scenarios and you’ll likely realize it’s not as terrifying as you think.
14 thoughts on “Self Doubt”
This is my fave post of yours yet. Definitely connected with this one. I’ll have to read that book. That strategy is truly helpful.
Thank you so much! It’s a strategy I will continue to use.
Love this and really love that you are embracing all the things you’re doing (things I am so excited to see you do!) . Thank you for being an amazing coach and support system ❤️
Thank you! It’s fun to step outside of my comfort zone… I need people like you to help me do it!
This is on point! I love your points and find myself doing much of the same. I need to work on changing my mindset to asking myself what’s the worst that can happen as you suggested too!
It’s a strategy I will continue to come back to and use! So much is just in our head! Thanks for sharing.
Wow!!! This entire posted resonated with me 100%. I am exactly like how you described yourself. I also struggled with starting a blog which I have finally done. The online fitness coach i did for a while. I also remember as a child not wanting to raise my hand because my answer might be wrong. I always loved medical and wanted to be a Dr but I was afraid I wouldn’t be okay in med school so I pursued law as a paralegal instead. I love this post thank you so much for writing it. I am going to share it around because it’s something alot of women should read ♡
Hi Nicole! What a sweet comment! I hate that it resonates with so many people, but that strategy really does work!
100% Self doubt gets me every once in while and I have to change my mindset! This was an inspiring read! Thank you.
Thank you so much for sharing. Mindset is everything!
Thank you for this post. Seriously, I know self doubt too well, so this is a great strategy for me to get back on the track. I’m curious about the other chapters of the book. It is definitely going on my to-buy list.
This book is SO great! One I will be reading multiple times. Thanks for reading and sharing, Hannah!
Self doubt is something I think everyone struggles with. Thanks for posting this!
Hi Lynsey! Thanks for your comment… I hope you find it helpful!